Crossing the Line
When you are a parent there are fuzzy invisible lines in life. You don't know where they are or when they are crossed but inevitably when raising a child there is a point when they are. One day you look back and realize something changed.
It happens in the smallest things yet the ones that make you smile and also make you sad. When you are a father and have a son there is some point when they stop holding your hand. When kisses disappear and when hugs are farther and farther apart. When the unbridled admiration a child holds for their parent isn't quite so strong, when they would rather spend a weekend with their friends than with you. We look at the pictures that line our walls detailing each stage of their growth and wish we could step back for a moment in time. This is not to diminish the pride we feel as they progress and become adults yet there is something innocent that seems gone. I think this is one reason why some parents have children later into life. They never find themselves able to let go.
When I drop my son off at school in the morning I can't help but think of all the parents around experiencing the same thing. They all wave goodbye to their kids, reach to have a kiss that no longer comes and wonder if they embarrassed their child by telling them they love them.
Maybe it is some kind of evolutionary protective mechanism but it seems like it is the hormones surging in each child that drives them away. The 13 year old girls all seem to have the same sneer on their faces as they walk toward the building. The boys run to catch up with their friends trying to look cool and seldom if ever looking back.
As parents we know that each day we are saying goodbye. It is a long process but it seems so short. We never want it to be the last goodbye but we know in our hearts that little by little, they will become further and further apart.
As a child grows older so does a parent. We spend years learning how to be a parent only to find we have to let it go. We have to learn to change our role yet never stop loving. All the while that picture hangs on our wall of our child when they were so young, so innocent. If only we could hear their voice just one more time.
It happens in the smallest things yet the ones that make you smile and also make you sad. When you are a father and have a son there is some point when they stop holding your hand. When kisses disappear and when hugs are farther and farther apart. When the unbridled admiration a child holds for their parent isn't quite so strong, when they would rather spend a weekend with their friends than with you. We look at the pictures that line our walls detailing each stage of their growth and wish we could step back for a moment in time. This is not to diminish the pride we feel as they progress and become adults yet there is something innocent that seems gone. I think this is one reason why some parents have children later into life. They never find themselves able to let go.
When I drop my son off at school in the morning I can't help but think of all the parents around experiencing the same thing. They all wave goodbye to their kids, reach to have a kiss that no longer comes and wonder if they embarrassed their child by telling them they love them.
Maybe it is some kind of evolutionary protective mechanism but it seems like it is the hormones surging in each child that drives them away. The 13 year old girls all seem to have the same sneer on their faces as they walk toward the building. The boys run to catch up with their friends trying to look cool and seldom if ever looking back.
As parents we know that each day we are saying goodbye. It is a long process but it seems so short. We never want it to be the last goodbye but we know in our hearts that little by little, they will become further and further apart.
As a child grows older so does a parent. We spend years learning how to be a parent only to find we have to let it go. We have to learn to change our role yet never stop loving. All the while that picture hangs on our wall of our child when they were so young, so innocent. If only we could hear their voice just one more time.
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