Winner By a Hair
As I march toward the future and age exercises its steady and firm grasp on my life, I find myself progressively looking for ways to detour its progress. Its like I am standing behind a dike and bit by bit leaks are sprouting all along it. Desperate to stop the flow of water I place my fingers in the holes, then my toes. Right before me a huge hole opens and with no appendage left I open my my mouth, pick up a wad of cash and smash it into the increasing gap. We all have things we hate about our own bodies. In a cruel twist of fate the powers of the universe or, perhaps it was my grandfather's fault, wrapped hair frustratingly into my genetic code. No, not hair in the good places like on my head. Oh no, why would I want hair there? It would only serve to shade my scalp from the sun and conceal the raw sexiness of my rounded skull. As it is I have a built in oven I could fry an egg on in the summer if I wanted. No, my grandfather willed me a bald head and hair in the mo